Is there ever a morning where you effortlessly wake up on your cool,fluffy pillow, your rested face clear of any oil or blemishes, the warm 8am sun dancing on your face? Well, not for me.
Since I serve in a restaurant, often working long late hours, I get home at the start of the tomorrow, throw off my greasy apron and open my fridge looking for my craving to magically appear behind the old yogurts and generic mustard from the cookout last month, but since that doesn't happen very often, I fling open the cabinet and settle for a bag of stale chips and a spoonful of JIF, extra crunchy. I finally take my ratdog out and then finally, around 2am I hop in my bed and crack open my new laptop, (thanks Dad). After losing track of what seems only like minutes I usually fall asleep close to 4am.
My phone starts screaming at me begging for me to get up at the crack of dawn, by that I mean 11am, I grunt and groan smack the first button I can hit to shut it up and continue hibernating the day away. It's a horrible habit, sleeping in, but the sun and I seem to be on different schedules. After getting up at 2 or 3 depending on which job I work at, I untangle myself out of my sheet-burrito I cooked overnight and look at how much time I have left to get ready.
I look like I've stood in front of a military jet, and used some hair spray to make that look work for me. Since I have extremely curly hair there's no way to just "put some product in it and go" so that's the first thing I deal with. My eyelashes are caked together and for some reason, my right contact is continuously blurry, yet my left one is extremely dry from the WalMart fan on level three blowing straight at my pupil. As I'm still half asleep I manage to take the babyoil and some hot water and pressure wash my eyelashes free from falsies mascara. Then the routine; shower, get dressed and grab everything in my room and stick it in my purse and rush out the door like I'm late to my own funeral. I then run back up the stairs of my third level apartment unlock the door and recheck my already turned off straightener and light, shake my head, bolt down to my grill-less car and blare some "hot jamz" til I get into function mode, and by 5pm I'm awake and ready to start my day!
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